FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

I will allow you to design a tattoo for my skin. This is a great honor, as I am sure you know. Will you pay me for the honor to design this piece for me?


Fuck You. Pay Me.




Why did I just find out that you are staying right down the street and I have yet to see you?


I am a bit of an introvert and have social anxiety. I also assume you have better things to do with your time than hang out with the likes of me.




Can I eat it?


Certainly!




I heard you don't like Italian Beef Sandwiches, are you a fucking Trump supporter/sympathizer?"


I don't know how this rumor got started. I'm totally cool with Italian Beefs... Trump on the otherhand, not so much.




How are you feeling today?





Why is art?


Is it really though?




Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?


I'd like to think so, yes.




When you look at people that you would like to feel have been a mentor or an inspiring kind of archetype of what you'd love to see your career eventually be mentioned as a footnote for in the same paragraph, would it be, like, Bowie?


Nope. Nothing like Bowie.




I drank what?





Which sculpter do you think would make the best Subway Sandwich Artist?


Gian Lorenzo Bernini would make a mean BMT.




Are you even can't not paint items aside from but not limited to death?





Who’s on first?


That is correct. Who's on first.




How do I get to your website?


I'm not sure. Ask Jeeves or something.




How do I know if I like your stuff?


You don't. How could you?




I am Prince from Zamunda. I have recently acquired $27,000,000.00. I would like to share with you. Can I have your bank account information?


Sure thing. Let's take this to private email prince.




How tall is the Sears Tower, true or false?


False.





HELP

FOLLOW ME

©2020 SCOTT SHELLHAMER